"There are times when the one thing you want is the one thing you never get...there are those times when God, having given us his grace, hears our appeals and says, "My grace is sufficient for you"...Is he still a good God when he says no?" -Max Lucado
When I look back at the last 6 years, there are several catch phrases from my coaches that stick out at me. But the single most memorable one (perhaps from the most repetition, or just the fact that it manifests itself everywhere) would have to be:
Life is not fair.
Over the years, I grew to feel this phrase was a cop-out - their way of just saying "suck it up" whenever they didn't have an answer for something. And there were and are many questions for which there are no answers.
With the Olympics upon us, I was looking up results from the various world and regional qualifying tournaments. And though I'm really happy for them, I have to say there is a part of me can't ignore the thorn in my side that jabs every time I see someone that I have fought - someone that I have beaten in the past - now going to the Olympics.
And as one of my old training partners lamented once upon a time, sometimes I too wonder - when is it going to be my turn? There is this intrinsic, perhaps ideal belief, that if you work hard enough, long enough, and you're good enough - that you will eventually get your "turn". Just once, the chips will fall your way, you'll get that perfect pitch down the middle, pieces will fit together...
But the reality is - you might not. You might choke. You might be cheated. You might get injured. The reality is - life is not fair. Times like these I have "the-prodigal-son-is-my-younger-brother" moments, shaking my fist and asking, "for all my work, where is my party?"
But you can only shake your fist for so long before your arm gets tired. So now that my arm's tired, I guess the new question is not "why is life not fair?" - but "what am I going to do about it?"
"The important thing is that those 20 boys know in 20 years, they didn't leave anything on the table. They played their hearts out. That's the important thing. -Miracle
So how many times do you play your heart out before you decide to let it go? Realistically speaking, it's a very real possibility to give your very best year after year, and for whatever reason - come up short. For every winner there are countless losers. And being a loser really stinks. Because whether you lost in the first round or lost in the finals - if your goal was to win it all, then you still lost.
It all has to do with how the goals were defined.
It all has to do with how the goals were defined.
A former Olympian once made me promise that I wouldn't retire until I had achieved my goal. I supposed that's why he won the Olympics - he fought with a broken foot, broken fingers, broken everything, just so he wouldn't have to live with a broken heart.
As the new year approaches, I was meeting with the kid I mentor. Very bright, very curious - very lazy. In the quest to squeeze his potential out of him, we watched the movie "Akeelah and the Bee" and discussed what success means, and how to set and achieve goals. And as we outlined long and short-term goals for him, I realized - the path to success has everything to do with which goals you set when, and how you plan to achieve them.
Maybe that yin-yang crap wasn't a load of crap after all. All of this boils down to a marriage of realism and idealism, of relaxed and tense, simultaneously remembering and forgetting everything you know. What took me so long to see it, I don't know. But as I told my mentee - big goals are made up of little goals - some of which are the hardest of them all.
And the first step to the biggest goal of all - is the willingness to put your heart out there, knowing full well it could be stepped on, ground up, and left by the wayside. Again. All for that chance, that maybe, you just might get your turn.
As the new year approaches, I was meeting with the kid I mentor. Very bright, very curious - very lazy. In the quest to squeeze his potential out of him, we watched the movie "Akeelah and the Bee" and discussed what success means, and how to set and achieve goals. And as we outlined long and short-term goals for him, I realized - the path to success has everything to do with which goals you set when, and how you plan to achieve them.
Maybe that yin-yang crap wasn't a load of crap after all. All of this boils down to a marriage of realism and idealism, of relaxed and tense, simultaneously remembering and forgetting everything you know. What took me so long to see it, I don't know. But as I told my mentee - big goals are made up of little goals - some of which are the hardest of them all.
And the first step to the biggest goal of all - is the willingness to put your heart out there, knowing full well it could be stepped on, ground up, and left by the wayside. Again. All for that chance, that maybe, you just might get your turn.
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same." -Marianne Williamson/Akeelah and the Bee
