sometimes you want to go...

it's kind of nice to have been missed. of course, the narcissistic side of us likes to think that we matter to people and that our presence is so significant that our absence has to be noticed. but after a few weeks off of church, it was pleasantly surprising to hop in the van and see faces i didn't realize i'd missed.

peter: "i feel like i haven't seen you in a long time!" (um, that's because you haven't.)

alicia: "where have you been???" (um, why are you smacking my arm? it's quite bruised.)

and when i walked into service

coach steve (with his program covering the lower half of his face): "hey! where have YOU been?" (um, remove the program and let me see how bad the scruff is).

as a side note - i find it pretty amusing that my overwhelming distaste for facial hair makes him hide from me on the days he didn't shave. (in the words of monica: "YES! nagging WORKS!") i really don't understand why asian guys think that scruff looks good. it's not rugged - it's just kinda dirty.

anyways.

and then i ran into pastor walter, who always gives me a smile and some sort of encouragement. gosh, our pastors are just such nice guys, and they always go out of their way to have a conversation - i really appreciate that. he stopped me on my way in to tell me that i was doing a great job as prayer champion. i stopped in my tracks because his encouragement seemed so unmerited (i mean, how does he know what i'm doing and how well i'm doing it? i wasn't even there the day he visited our small group) but it was just kind of ... nice. i think sometimes i think i can just not go to church and have my sundays free. but then i realize that as far off as i may feel sometimes (heck, there's a body of water separating us) - i'm a part of the community.

peter was going to take me home, and we stopped by tenafly to drop off austin at the alpha luncheon. it was nice to be at tenafly again - the church feels so different than edgewater. though it's a different building and across the country - i had momentary flashbacks to youth group and fellowship hour after church. you know, one of those out-of-body time-stands-still moments where you're just frozen and overcome by some memory where it feels so real you can almost smell it.

at the end of the day...i think all this nonsense gave me a reassurance that i made the right decision in switching churches, and that Joy is indeed becoming my new home. and after pastor danny's sermon today...and seeing all the kids running around...and the fact that tlc's will be cancelled for the summer and i should have more time...perhaps i'll think about children's ministry and teaching sunday school.