looking back

I didn't realize how much I missed Boston until I finally came back.

I've never done so much "EEEEEE!"-ing and hugging in one day before. So good to see everyone...we had the last 3 years of ACF staffers in the kitchen making kimbap and ddukgook for the kids tonight...so crazy to see how the ministry has grown, and that the kids are growing up.

Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if I hadn't have left. Could've should've would've, I suppose. In one sense, I bet I could have found community, I really enjoyed hanging out with everyone today, alums and non-alums ... but in a way I almost feel that it was better to just move away and be forced to forge an entirely new post-college life. For the same reason that perhaps it was good for me to wait so long to return, I see that if I hadn't made a clean break, I would have hung on to the past and never moved forwards.

I feel like I'm in a good place to be back now - one where I won't constantly be remembering and longing for what once was, but being able to appreciate and cherish the friendships and experiences that were so great in the past without dwelling in those memories. It makes reunions joyful instead of wistful.

But I did miss Boston, and all those who came with it. No doubt about that.