Seniority

I think it's interesting when I look at Sab Sr and Sab Jr. I mean, they're twins. They were probably born minutes apart. What's a few minutes in age?

A lot, apparently. The seniority is so strong between them, it's really quite fascinating. Jr really does seem to defer most of the time.

So at the tournament this weekend, there weren't any middleweights for me to spar. To qualify for the team spot, I had to then win the team trials between the middle and heavyweights. There were two heavys, and one of them was a girl who trains at West Side. But the thing is, she's messy and kind of awkward - the probability of getting injured was quite high. And I just don't like sparring her. So I was going back and forth with Sr trying to decide what to do if Kay won. I was really wavering on it and he was trying to force me to make a decision. All I wanted was to be told what to do, and he wouldn't tell me.

So I was mulling it over and must have looked stressed out when I walked by Jr. Well, I generally wear my heart on my sleeve (or my face, as the case may be) and he's pretty good at figuring out when something's up.

"What's wrong?"
"I can't decide whether to spar Kay or not."
"Don't spar. You'll get injured."

OK, there's my answer. I turn around, go back to Sr, and tell him. He says "good" and I walk away.

Apparently (Sue tells me later) then Jr and Sr talked and Sr chewed him out for telling me what to do and said he had to let me make my own decisions.

Which spurs Jr to come back to me.

"Have you made your decision?"
"Yeah, I'm not going to spar her."
"Are you sure?"
"Um. Yes?"
"Are you sure?"
"Um...yes."
"OK."

So in retrospect I guess that was his way of "letting" me decide, although the way it was posed it put me back in the situations where they ask me a question where there's an answer that they want to hear, and they keep asking me until I say it with enough confidence that they're satisfied. I didn't realize he was actually asking me what I thought.

So then with respect to this Mexico trip, I kind of want to go. After all, I earned my spot. I presented the case, and got two very different reactions.

Jr said "let's discuss".
Sr said "sounds like you want to go. Good! Go."

I'm not sure which I like better. I think I'd rather be told what to do. But maybe it's better for me to learn to make my own decisions. Hrrrrrm.

So even though Sr is "nicer" to me and I feel closer to him - maybe it is Jr in the end who "coddles" me more.

Trying to figure them out...slowly but surely.

Pictures from the weekend forthcoming, should I figure out how to use this bloggerbot thingy...