T-minus 1 day

"Accept the pain, cherish the joys, resolve the regrets; then can come the best of benedictions." -Joan Mcintosh

I find it funny that I got this "refresh your soul" meditations thingy for Christmas from church way back in high school. And that it sat in my closet for years before I finally thought to use it. I mean, it's not like anyone thought to get it for me - it was the generic gift that year that "Santa harabuhjee" comes and gives to everyone. Over the years I've amassed a collection of "Chicken Soup for the Soul" and probably pounds and pounds of See's candy.

But this calendar of thoughts has actually been pretty inspiring. Well, at least thought-inducing. And as I try to dissect why I'm feeling so "pouty" these days (as Adodo calls it), it makes sense.

Accept the pain - there's nothing I can do about being injured. What hurts, hurts. Use it or don't. I've been icing, stretching, and taking massive amounts of drugs. There's nothing more I can do, so I may as well just accept that things aren't really going to feel great and just do what I can.

Cherish the joys - Even if 9/10 kicks stink - there was still a good one in there. Even if Sabs score a gajillion points on me and kick me in the head - I can still score a couple points. Even if I'm dead tired and want to throw up...hrmm OK there's no joy in throwing up. Scratch that one. Despite all the pressure to win this weekend - there have to be moments where it will be fun, training with new people, new coaches, new drills.

Resolve the regrets - Well. It's not like I can make last week come back. It's not like I can make Sabs have magically been able to be there when they weren't, or not had to teach when I did. What's done is done and if it was negative, then dwelling on it only makes what's coming negative. (Easy to say, hard to do).

It's the person in me who has to see everything turn out in the best possible way. To see everything maxxed out to full potential, and utter frustration when things go wrong. How to balance what can be with what just is.

I think that's the source of my frustration.

Funny, that's the source of theirs too.

I find this all to be some strange paradox where I absolutely disagree but simultaneously absolutely agree with them. It's weird.

So basically what this quote is saying is:

"Suck it up, smile, let sh*t go...and everything will be OK"

Somehow it makes more sense this way.